I have been wanting to post today. Wanting too, but really not knowing what to say. 10 years seems like a life time ago. So much has happened in the last decade. Ralph and I have moved 5 times. Ralph has gotten a degree, I still don't have one. We have had 3 beautiful daughters. Ralph has baptized 2 of them. I have discovered much about myself, my faith. I have grown up. I have been permanently marked. I would not trade any of the experiences I have had the last 10 years. That does not mean that I don't wish that I would have a 10 year old son running around. I do wish that. I do wish that I would not have had to say goodbye as I was saying hello. I do wish that my husband had a son to teach what it means to be a man. I do wish that my daughters had an older brother to defend them at school, even as he picked on them at home. I have many wishes........
Even as I wish, I know. I know that I trust the road God has lead us down. I trust that the experiences I have had in the last 10 years have not been wasted. I trust that I have grown. I trust that I have a stronger faith. I trust that every struggle has been a stepping stone in the path God wants for me. And because I trust, I can be thankful.
So, happy birthday son. You are wanting for nothing. You are whole and healthy. You are son who is missed. You are a brother, who has given your sisters a connection to heaven. I thank God for the opportunity to be your mother....
"I will lift up my eyes to the hills -
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip-
he who watches over you will not slumber."
Psalm 121:1-3